My problem is that i care too much. I spend a lot of time thinking about what people think of me, and think of what I might do instead of just doing things.

Yes, holding public approval can be a good thing, but it's not the only thing.

Thinking about things that transpired over the holidays, and just at my whole life, I find myself being this middle man who is torn between 'doing what others perceive to be good/right' and what I perceive to be good/right. Sometimes they coincide, and in many situations they don't.

People have different beliefs, have different attitudes, perspectives, and because of that, there is often a difference in opinions. Because of my 'people-pleasing' nature, I'm more inclined to be stuck in the middle, whereas the other person can get away 'conscience-free'.

As a nurse, something we're constantly taught is to know where we stand, and be comfortable with our own beliefs. It's only at this point can we really treat people with beliefs different than ours. I think a lot of times we defend our own values/beliefs not necessarily because we want the other person to believe them, but we feel threatened that someone else may sway us - at best it's a defense mechanism.

Developing the confidence in knowing where I stand and what I believe is something that I've struggled with forever, and entering a profession where a lot of people are going to be different than me - it's daunting. All I can hope for is in these last few months of being a student, I can really question this, and learn to be comfortable in my own skin. To stop having 'bad days' because i felt ignored, or i felt someone was judging me. Ultimately, to be proud of who I am, and be confident in all the actions I carry out .